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November 30, 2012

I am...




I make lists... long lists of "to-do's"... this isn't that kind of list... except it is, sort of.
  • I am addicted to sugar: raw, processed it doesn't matter... I just need (note the NEED) & do to consume mass amounts of sugar
  • I am a procrastinator (like a Ninja skilled/trained procrastinator)
  • I am afraid (of success... of failure...)
  • I am sad and then: I am frustrated that I am sad
  • I am angry with myself
  • I am a fixer of others
  • I am weak
  • I am stubborn
  • I am the mama and all that goes with that
  • I am the cleaner of pee on the floors
  • I am unemployed (as a source of added income) b/c being mama is a job that I do love, just doesn't pay the bills... pays the heart =)
  • I am worried about money most all the time... no, all the time.
  • I am over-weight, by my rather loose standards
  • I am out of shape... a fast walk around the farm and I'm out of breath and need a nap
  • I am tired.... of all the negatives
  • I am a "bad" student  (ie: not doing the work, not following simple direction)
  • I avoid confrontation
  • I am unhealthy/weak both mind and spirit
  • I am unhappy with myself
I want to adjust/learn/encompass a consistent practice to alleviate or minimize the lax behaviors...

  • I don't know how
  • I need someone to hold me accountable to me... because 
    • I am not

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